Hi,
this is a little more about what keeps me up at night.
totally different that what I usually post about.
well should i say, what thoughts freak me out at night.
Im sure someone said to know oneself is to know they own fears..
I cant remember who at the moment. (give me a break its 4am)
I do a lot of research/reading and watch crazy amounts of videos on youtube about
religion, and spiritual findings in search of truth.
I have frequent trouble sleeping, and when I am awake search for the truth on the internet.
Sometimes I find things that make it impossible to sleep for even the next night.
Aliens freak me out. if you have netflix, watch Ancient aliens .. please.
Organized religion also freaks me out.
I want to publicly state, I believe in god, jesus, the holy trinity, and that jesus died for all of mankinds sins.
I do not, however, believe in religion.
the idea of people gathering to speak about truth, love, mankinds brotherhood is a great one, but does not seem to fit what it was intended to do. I feel there are too many snakes in the mix.
I can remember in the bible (id have to find the particular passage) mentioning religion is flawed by mankind.
People need to gather, I agree, but a conventional church on sunday may not be the answer. In fact, could be counter-productive to actual truth.
every person needs to find their own answers, and according to the bible, the christ is the way and the light.
when we die, and receive our judgement, let us be accepted for our devotion and belief in jesus christ.
I think the reason we are here (this planet) is for love, truth, service of the lord, and helping the others around us.
At my lowest point here on earth, I reached out to the lord. And he responded.
I feel he saved me, and would also save anyone that asked for it in his name.
I would say our ultimate goal is to give ourselves to the lord, and allow him to receive us.
there are too many (we are all guilty of this) who need/want material possessions.
I have recently started to think that the more we have in a possession sense, the further we are from god, jesus and the truth. (look at celebrities.. that have $$$$ and still have the same issues we normal people do)
That is not a hard rule, and there are exceptions im sure.
Im not saying having a reasonable amount of wealth, property, possessions are a forced ticket into hell.
I am myself guilty of accumulating too many cars, computers, and technologies, which i try to repair, refurb, and distribute to family and friends.
At the end of the day, you have nothing, leave with nothing, and are naked.
why do you fear having nothing if the lord will provide for you ?
We we born with what we needed, nothing more, nothing less.
I agree some clothes would be nice, and maybe material possessions, but do not let your possessions own you.
Another point I would like to make while I am attempting at speaking the truth is work.
Work seems to some like it is their whole being. Never let your job own you.
I understand we all need to provide for our families, and our futures. But at what cost ?
Never let your self values be toyed with or overridden by your employer - even in this economy.
As a higher level IT professional (sure, there are much better ones than I) I find myself thinking about linux code, windows server setups, how to improve this that and others... ect..
A few ago, when i was a normal desktop technician, I dont remember having these thoughts all the time.
maybe it was second nature to me, and I didnt have to think about it anymore. Either way, I try to leave it alone, but being out of work at the moment doesnt help me not think about or strive to learn maybe something I feel I am lacking, making me strive for more.
There are so many things I think about, but some of them, I dont even like to write down.
One of those things is technology.
I remember a time when we all existed with OUT this internet thing. Granted, even i was on a computer when i was like 13-14 years old on bulletin boards (BBS systems) trying to be a SysOp.
That was pre-internet intranets, set up at people's houses via a modem (gasp!).
There are a few uses of the net that are great. Searching for truth is one.
the internet has not been totally censored yet, but im sure it is in the works.
But to go back to my original point, I remember when there was no cell phones, nevermind smart phones.
there were beepers, and only doctors had them.
I think we should all start to move away from technology as a way away from a social crutch for technology.
I think tech has its places .. medical, and such. But, to rely totally on a computer to me seems scary.
I wish everything was back the way it was in the 80's or earlier. Sure we can accomplish more faster better longer what have you.
to give an example, I want my car not to have a computer. I want it to have 3 things ... the same things it needs now, without a computer interpretting what it thinks and how many cycles, knocks, and other factors involved in running a typical car engine.
the 3 things.. spark, air and fuel.
does it really need to be more innovative than that ? engine takes in air, which is combusted in the chambers of the engine, and when mixed with fuel causes a explosion forcing the half the intake valves to open, while the other half of the engine has the exhaust valves open to force the expended fuel (exhaust) to exit the combustion chamber.
They could make cars that get 100mpg 100 years ago, and other vehicles that run on water.
Oil companies killed them off so that they can stay rich, while we drive gas hogs. I may be guilty of that one also, but my corvette was a weekend driver, and babied at that. I spent more time repairing it, than I did driving it. the prelude is better, but not one of the most fuel saving cars on the planet either. At least this particular one was not highly modified for once, just some normal maint. to save $ in the future.
but, enough about cars/fuel/oil.
I want to make the point that I am afraid of the future for its robotic/technology driven future.
As we dredge further into darkness, I find it harder and harder to think everything is going to be ok.
